poor choices

For the past year I have been having a struggle with my Daughter about the choices that she has been making in her life. I can still hear my father saying to my mom those wise words , experience is the best teacher and a fool learns by no other. So I am trying to put this theory into practice but it is not easy at all. Last winter was one of the hardest that we had, the weather was awful and my daughters behavior was even worse. Her relationship with that young man was driving me crazy. Then in February everything reach a boiling point. I began to suspect that he was in some kind of trouble. My daughter was very secretive about him. All I could do was pray and wait for the truth to reveal itself. Second weekend of February came and the young man showed up at our door steps. At the time I did not know that he was kicked out of his brothers house or why. I let him stay until he could find some other place to stay. Monday the local police came looking for him, I assumed it was drug related . I went with him so he could talk to them. I said to him to just tell the truth and that this might be a chance for him to get his life straightened out. He was in big trouble but it was not with drugs.

Last Summer Contined

I had made the doctors appointment for my daughter around the end of September. On the day of the appointment I asked her if she wanted me to go into the doctors treatment room with her and she said no. Therefore I sat in the waiting room while she was with the doctor for almost two hours. As we were on our way home, I asked her if she was okay and if she wanted to talk about it. She again said no. All I can tell you is that she had a false pregnancy, which is what she told me. However in the weeks to come she would slip into a very deep depression. I tried to get her to go to counciling but she said no that there was nothing anyone could say or do to make her feel better. She slowly started to pull herself together, so I thought. Shortly before Thanksgiving, She heard from the young man again. They had moved about 16 miles from our home. So they began to have some contact again. She apparently found out where they lived and had a friend take her to see him, except that she told me that she was spending the weekend with a girlfriend. She spent the weekend with them. I was not a happy mom when I found out the truth. Prior to my Daughter getting involved with this guy we had an open and honest relationship. She knew that I did not want her hanging around with that family because of their drug habits. My Daughter knows how I feel about drug abuse and she use to agree but not anymore.

Trouble with Teenagers

Why is it that when you talk to a teen about what you feel is good sound advice, they do not listen. I just don't get it. My Father was right when he said experience is the best teacher and a fool learns by no other. Getting back to my story on what happened last summer. The family that my daughter was practically living were being evicted. She was very upset because she had fallen for the young man that was taking care of his brother's young children. At every chance that I had , I tried to talk the young man into leaving that home and to move into another place. My advice was falling on deaf ears. Now they were moving away and my Daughter was heart broken. I was grateful that the lord had see fit to answer my prayer. So it was that last August that family moved out and I was hoping that my Daughter and I could get back to normal. Little did I know that her life had changed forever. She began to think that she was pregnant, even though she was using birth control. The young man was the father and he was gone . She had no phone number, no forwarding address no nothing. We went and bought a pregnancy test. The test was positive, I called my gyn. and made an appointment.

Power Of Prayer

I was becoming very concerned about the company my daughter was keeping last summer. I had hoped that she would get a job. All she cared about was hanging out with that family. Therefore I began to pray. My grandfather was a minister and I was taught to put give your troubles to the Lord. I would pray everyday to the Lord to keep my daughter from harm. I would also pray for that family to move away. Sure enough, my prayer was to be answered. I came home from work one day in early August and my daughter was upset because that family was being evicted for not paying their rent. I was so relieved and grateful to the Lord. I talked to my daughter about this new event, how it was for the best but she did not want to hear what I had to say. All she could think about was that she was losing the love of her life. I still tried to talk some sense into her but all my talk was falling on deaf ears. So once again I had to place my troubles into the Lords hands. Our lives were changing, not necessarily for the better. My daughter should have been focusing on her up coming school year and her future. Instead she was obsessed about a boy who was trapped in a unhealthy family life. I could see that I had a whole lot of praying to do.

Last Summer

It was becoming clear to me that my daughter had fallen in love with this young man. I was not pleased about this at all. She always seems to gravitate to misfits. I did like this young man and had he come from a normal family. Things probably would have worked for them. As I said , my daughter is not attracted to normal teens, if there is such a thing. This young man came from a very troubled back ground. He was born to a woman who had very serious substance abuse issues. he was taken away from her when he was an infant. I don't know if he was in foster care or adopted. He does suffer from ADHD. He also has angry problems, which was why I felt it was a bad idea for him to be a nanny to the little ones. I was afraid that he would lose his temper and physically abuse them. He got rough with my Daughter, just kidding around but left bruises on her. He was always very sorry. My daughter always made excuses for his behavior. I always told him what he did was wrong and reminded him that the male members of our family were protective of my Daughter. If any guy had left bruises on me as a young women, my Father would have killed him. I am no different then my Father.

Teenager In Trouble contined

My Daughter began to tell me about this teenage boy that I had recently met. He lived with his half brother and wife, who were the parents of the young children that he was playing nanny to. This just did not look okay to me. The parents at the time were working and he was helping them out. They were a young couple in their 20s. My daughter began to spend alot of time at their home because she was attracted to the young man . I don't blame her after all he is a very nice looking and charming young man. I was concerned that they might practice unsafe sex and I was not ready for her to be a parent. So I made sure they had the needed protection. I also began to hear rumors about the young couple, wild parties, drinking , smoking dope. There always seemed to be teenagers hanging out at their house, my daughter was always one of them. This went on for most of last summer. I tried to get my daughter away from them and the young man as well. I knew that the couple was using him for a nanny so that they could party. I told him he didn't have to stay there and that they were wasting his life as well as theirs. Also those poor little kids needed to be taken away from them. He told me that was why he was there to protect thse little ones.